Everything you need to know about sleep problems in toddlers and children

About 15 to 30% of all children between 4 and 10 years old suffer from sleep problems. This includes difficulties falling asleep, staying asleep, or sleeping in. Sleep problems are tough for your child and for you as a parent. Sleep is very important, and less sleep has many consequences.

A child with sleep problems experiences poorer concentration and is more easily irritable. This affects your child's well-being as well as yours. Moreover, a good night's sleep is very important for your child's health and development.

There are various factors that affect your child's sleep quality. Additionally, some preschoolers and children are more sensitive to poor sleep than others.

Physical causes of sleep problems in children

Physical complaints can be the cause of poor sleep in children. For example, allergies, intestinal problems, congenital abnormalities, or chronic middle ear infections can cause poor sleep. But shortness of breath can also play a role in poor sleep in children. If your child snores, it may be due to a narrowing of the throat and windpipe. This often occurs with enlarged tonsils or overweight. You can always visit the doctor for this.

Fears as a cause of sleep problems in children

It may also be that your child experiences fears and therefore does not sleep well. This can happen, for example, when your child experiences a lot of stress, has gone through something unpleasant, or is worried about something.

First of all, it is important that your child falls asleep well. Ensure a comfortable sleeping place, a calm bedtime routine, and a good daily schedule.

If your child has trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, it is also important to look at how the day and evening go. Does your child spend enough time outside, does he or she get plenty of exercise? And how much screen time does your child have?

In addition, you can help your child relax before he or she goes to sleep. Let your child express his or her emotions. Also, provide a comfortable place to unwind. A weighted blanket for children can help children and toddlers relax. The weighted blankets provide a subtle pressure on your child's body. Children experience this pressure as a gentle hug, which has a calming effect. Because of the pressure from the blanket, children fall asleep faster. Their brains receive the signal that they are lying comfortably and the nervous system relaxes. This helps your child fall asleep more quickly.

For toddlers, the goal should be that they learn how to sleep well on their own, without being dependent on you as a parent. These three tips can help you with that:

When you follow a step-by-step plan, you gradually help your toddler get used to falling asleep alone. You start with step 1, where you sit next to your child's bed without responding. This means no eye contact and no talking to your toddler. You are present in the room. Each day, you can sit a little further away from your child until you reach the door. Then you can sit outside the room on the stairs until you are no longer nearby.

This method is often used for toddlers who suffer from separation anxiety. Your toddler learns to fall asleep independently, with your presence.

If the above technique is too time-consuming, you can also create a return visit step-by-step plan. This involves briefly checking on your toddler according to a fixed schedule.

You can then tell your child that if he or she goes to sleep, you will come back to check in five minutes. If your toddler starts calling or shouting, wait the full 5 minutes before returning. When you enter the bedroom and your toddler is not yet asleep, it is important that you avoid eye contact and do not start any conversations. Give your toddler a gentle stroke and a kiss and say "go to sleep now."

You can extend the time between the times you check in each night.

If your preschooler is not sick, scared, or in pain, you can also choose to be strict. Being strict is the method by which your child learns fastest to fall asleep independently, but it is not often the most pleasant. If you choose this method, it is good to prepare your child. Tell your child that you will not come when he or she calls because you want to teach your child to fall asleep independently.

You put your preschooler to bed and give him or her no further attention. Even when your child cries and/or screams, you give no attention. Consider beforehand if you can maintain this, as it can be very tough.

Is your child between 7 and 10 years old and still having sleep problems? Then it is wise to involve your child in making a plan. The tips below can help you with this.

Children of this age are smart enough to tell you why they can't sleep. Ask your child questions and listen carefully, without giving tips or advice. Ask your child if something is bothering them and why they can't sleep well. It may be that your child is worrying a lot, feeling anxious, or not feeling well. You can also ask your child if he or she knows a solution that could help improve sleep. Then you can look together to try it out.

Children between 7 and 10 years old do a lot for a reward. Therefore, reward every good night in the morning with a big hug, positive reaction, and/or an extra nice moment together. Try to respond as positively as possible to your child. This makes learning good sleep habits easier.

Does your child often get out of bed? Then you can start using a 'bedtime pass.' This is a rule that your child may use once per evening. Your child may call out or get out of bed once. After that, he or she hands in the pass and you ignore the calling.

It may also be that changing your child's bedtime can help. He or she is simply getting older. Ensure a pleasant evening with calm moments and lots of positive attention. When your child is calm and tired because it is later, he or she will fall asleep faster.

Where adults use apps like Headspace and Calm to relax before bedtime, meditating with your child before sleep can also help. The focus here is on paying attention to the here and now, which stops your child from worrying. The internet is full of fun mindfulness exercises for children.

Besides preschoolers and children sleeping poorly, insomnia is a common problem in other life stages. Therefore, also read our other blog articles:

• Insomnia in toddlers
• Insomnia in teenagers
• Insomnia in adults